American Buddhist Net

How does one know our fears are delusional (versus true)?

When desires are delusional and harmful, we can tell because they have an extra energy; there is something excessive about them. Once we can identify this quality in our desires, it is much easier to control them (mainly by contemplating their negative aspects, how much time they waste, etc.). We can learn to control anger by observing ourselves and catching anger in the very moment it arises. In that small moment, we can choose either to go with it and feel bad for the rest of the day, if not longer, or we can simply stop ourselves and take a second look at the situation. With practice this is easier to do than it may seem. I suspect that something similar can be done to identify and disarm delusional fear. It surely must have some aspect to it that has a different, or excessive, feeling when compared to a healthy fear of, say, a wild animal or a dangerous path near a cliff. Once you can identify a single delusional fear, you should be able to control it in a manner similar to the one described for anger. And if you can do this once, you should be able to expand the lesson to other fears in other situations.

I am having trouble understanding the "letting go of the ego" notion in Buddhism...can someone explain in layperson's terms?

In a good deal of Buddhist literature there is material about the "ego" and all the bad stuff it does. This usually indicates the part of us that indulges in selfish and stupid things like greed, anger, delusion, pride, suspicion, jealousy, being sneaky, and so on. There is also a concept in Buddhism that says the "self" does not exist because it is "empty" (sunyata). In this way of thinking, we reinforce an empty self when we indulge in it, and we see more deeply through it when we learn not to follow its promptings. Most northern tradition Buddhists (sometimes called "Mahayana) would say that the "self" is entirely empty (devoid of "own being" or "intrinsic nature") while some in the southern tradition (Theravada) would say that there is a self that is sort of like a soul. This distinction matters at a philosophical level, but not much at the practical level, as all Buddhist traditions agree that indulging in the selfish self with all of its toxic fixations (kleshas) leads only to deeper entanglement in delusion. So, in this sense all Buddhists would probably agree that "letting go of the ego" is a good thing.

Does Buddhism view emotions as bad?

Buddhists often do view emotions with suspicion, but that does not make anyone less emotional. The key here might be the concept of a "skillful act" versus an "unskillful act." A skillful act is one that brings help to the self and others, while an unskillful act is one that brings harm to the self and others. It could be said that emotions that prompt skillful acts are "good," while those that prompt unskillful acts are "bad." The Buddhist term for morality is "sila" (shila) in Sanskrit. This term means "coolness" in the sense of being able to keep a reasonable distance from unskilled emotions that may cause us to break the five precepts or harm ourselves or others.